To the Editor:
Since the cancel culture’s goal is to wipe out any culture that is controversial or challenging, the solution is obvious — tear down all existing statues and monuments and replace them with statues of SpongeBob. At the same time, all universities should be renamed SpongeBob University. Since all will be teaching the same pablum, there is no worry about confusing one SpongeBob University with another. Down the road, we might insist that all congressmen and senators be named SpongeBob as well (“SpongeBob #411 votes nay”).
Finally, we will have a non-threatening society!