Hooded sweatshirt the unofficial state uniform

I couldn’t survive South Dakota, winter, fall, our shortlived springs, Black Hills summer nights and calving season without hooded sweatshirts. I wear them 320 days a year.

I want to clarify that I don’t wear “hoodies.” A hooded sweatshirt is an amped-up garment that is too gritty to be called by a sissy name. We’re talking the brute of work wear here!

Hooded sweatshirts go with everything no matter which job I have to do or blue jeans I put on. They’re the most versatile piece of clothing I’ve found anywhere. They suffice as a jacket and make a good outer layer over long underwear and T-shirts.

I wear hooded sweatshirts the way some people wear glasses.

My work demands durable, comfortable, non-restricting clothing especially when outside. Once I’ve used up the backs of my gloves to wipe my nose on, I can’t use the inside of a shirt collar without notice like I can with a hooded sweatshirt.

But more importantly, my barely-warmer-than-a-corpse body temperature demands this warm article of clothing. These sweatshirts are a necessary staple to keep me alive in South Dakota’s weather and should be our state garment.

I can’t talk about hooded sweatshirts without praising the extra-large capacity, accessible front pocket. They make carrying stuff handy. How many other shirts can you carry chicken eggs (carefully), the mail while on the four-wheeler, tools, gloves, empty travel mugs, a clothesline’s worth of clothespins, candy you want to hide because you don’t want to share, binoculars, or four or five cans of beer at a time?

The front pocket is the best place to find my car keys, chapstick, and sunglasses. When dropped into the abyss (my purse), they disappear. A hooded sweatshirt’s front pocket is where my hands prefer to hang out (they don’t like being separated) when they’re not busy flailing around helping me communicate or need to warm up.

I normally wear the sleeves down but they’ll easily adjust and can be pushed up when I have to get my hands dirty or cleaned up. Hooded sweatshirts with ratty-looking, stretched-out elastic cuffs are just as useful once the sleeves are cut off at elbow length.

My arms and shoulders are still covered but eliminate sleeves that need pushed out of the way in order to pull a calf, do dishes or knead bread.

The hood can cover my ears and head in bitter cold winds but acts like a built-in scarf to keep the back of my neck warm when not in use. The drawstrings which are designed to cinch up the hood around my face are optional. I prefer to use them to occupy my hands while thinking instead.

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