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BILL O'REILLY: Back to school

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opinion Mitchell, 57301
Mitchell South Dakota 120 South Lawler 57301

  Used to be most kids hated early September. Those back-to-school ads all over the place, and the dreaded specter of another long year sitting in front of Miss Crabtree or whomever. Most baby boomers like me equated Labor Day with a trip to the dentist.

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No longer.

These days many urchins actually LIKE school. They look forward to getting up early, hopping on the bus and learning their buns off. How is this even possible?

I think I know.

Simply put, many American children want to get away from their parents, some of whom micro-manage every move they make. These days, everything is set up for the kids. No longer do they have any freedom. It's play date this, sporting activity that. Camp here, seminar there. Climb a tree? You could be arrested and you might even get dirty.

So children experience more freedom at school than they do at home. In the hallways, they can relate to other kids and have actual conversations and horseplay without mom hovering around. Also, the high-tech gizmos in many classrooms give kids some power over their academic performances. So school is cool and much more stimulating than home.

My high school experience was mainly tedious. I had to take Latin. Amo, amas, amat. I am bored, you are bored, he, she or it is bored (loose translation). Five days a week, I fought slipping into a coma.

But when I got home, the fun began. My mother wanted me out of the house. The rule was: Be home by 6 and don't assault anyone. I ran wild. Tackle football without equipment, stickball in the street and competitive basketball on a cement court. It was non-stop action with no adults in sight. Why would anyone want to go to school?

Today, adults are swarming their kids like ants on Haagen-Dazs. The tykes are rarely unattended. Instead, they are shuttled from venue to venue in enormous SUV's driven by mothers holding huge cups of Starbucks in one hand and a cell phone in the other. Leisure time is often contrived and full of pressure to win a black belt or perfect ballet moves.

Wouldn't you rather be in school?

The obsession with offspring is part of an overall narcissistic plague that has infected the U.S.A. Children are now extensions of their parent's egos. They are scorecards. The parents win if their kids do well in whatever. The children feel this very personal pressure so much that school demands are almost a relief.

So three cheers for the beginning of the school term. After a summer of smother, the urchins are finally free to express themselves in classrooms all across America.

Amazing how things have changed.

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